Spider-Woman
A Beaconite spent Hurricane Irma alone in her house — except for the spider. The six-inch-long, reddish-orange, acrobatic, turbocharged arachnid was more than capable of being across the room, on the ceiling, or on the Beaconite’s shoulder in a matter of seconds. It was the Spider-Man of spiders, if you will. As the storm was closing in, she finally managed to trap it in a cardboard box just before the doors blew open and she had to take shelter in the bathroom. When the Beaconite returned, the box had blown out of the house, presumably taking the spider with it. She thought that unfortunate chapter of her life was over until this week, when that same spider, or its relative, infiltrated her new home for a rematch. This time, it was the spider that ended up in the bathroom. Knowing it could be lurking anywhere in there, and afraid to enter lest she let out the scream heard ’round the island, she called friends for help, though most just laughed (but wouldn’t if they’d actually seen this beast). So the Beaconite slept with one eye open that night, and avoided using the bathroom for most of the next day. Finally, she found a can of Raid powerful enough to fumigate the entire room remotely before shutting the door, and claimed ultimate victory. Still, when she goes home, she carefully examines every corner, wondering if this is only the latest installment in what could prove a long, long saga.
MLB in the VI?
A Beaconite was amused to learn that the owners of the Miami Marlins are trying to claim corporate citizenship in the Virgin Islands for courtroom purposes (see pg. 12 for the story). The Washington Post reported on Tuesday the territory’s new Major League Baseball team — which had a dismal 4-8 record as of press time — was averaging only 14,443 fans per home game, a 29.1 decrease from already-low 2017 attendance. Sports Illustrated reported that the Marlins lost to the Mets 4-2 on Monday night in front of only 7,003 people — the slimmest paid crowd in Marlins Park’s six-year history. If those audiences keep bleeding, maybe the squad can make good on their owners’ legal argument and have a few at-bats at E. Walwyn Brewley Softball Park. The Beaconite can see it now — Major League Baseball as the third pillar of the territory’s economy! Bring out the Premier Dr. Orlando Smith bobbleheads, Philly cheese steaks, hot dogs and kettle corn.
Comfortable ride
Usually, a ride in the back of a pickup truck might not be so comfortable. But one lucky rider a Beaconite noticed recently seemed to be getting the best ride ever — on top of a mattress. As the truck drove up Joes Hill, the rider lay back and looked so relaxed he might have been taking a nap. Though the Beaconite suspects this arrangement wasn’t particularly safe, he couldn’t help feeling a little envious.
VISAR
In the process of writing a story about Virgin Islands Search and Rescue, a Beaconite was invited into the organisation’s inner sanctum at the Road Reef Marina on Monday night. “Sorry for the mess,” was a common refrain from several members — a funny statement, considering the orderly section of helmets and jumpsuits, sleek VISAR boat and general destruction still surrounding the base in Road Town. Despite hurricane damage to the building’s exterior, roof and office space, VISAR has continued to conduct rescue operations since the storm. A reporter is looking forward to embedding with the group again later in the week, this time to watch as several new trainees prepare for future emergencies.