Tweet, Tweet
@FreemanVI Good news, everyone: I’ve decided to learn to twete!
@FreemanVI Err. Tweet.
@FreemanVI I know I’m a little behind the times. But I also know that my loyal readers are excited to keep up with my minute-to-minute observations and witty commentary on Virgin Is
@FreemanVI Oops. Apparently there’s some kind of artificial word limit on tweets. How will I express myself? This grossly violates my right to free spe
@FreemanVI Grrrrr! I’ve been cut off again. How can I be expected to tweet under these conditions? You can’t set an artificial limit on an artistic wri
@FreemanVI Whatever. Technology always forces artists to compromise. Anyway, let’s have some fun!
@FreemanVI Tweet! Tweet!
@FreemanVI Get it? I’m a bird. Haha!
@FreemanVI You’re following me, right?
@FreemanVI Get it? As in, following me in conversation AND following me on Twitter? Haha!
@FreemanVI By the way, if you are following me on Twitter, you’re my tweep. No offence, but it’s true. I just read it on Wikipedia.
@FreemanVI Okay, 11 tweets and I’ve said absolutely nothing. I confess: I have tweeter’s block. What the heck do people tweet about anyway?
@FreemanVI Brainstorming. Please bear with me, good tweeps. My tweets will get tweet-tastic as soon as I decide on suitable subject matter.
@FreemanVI Epiphany! I’ll use the Internet for Serious Research.
@FreemanVI A recent study found that 40 percent of tweets are “pointless babble.” I’ll try it.
@FreemanVI Answering Beacon phone.
@FreemanVI Leaving desk to get a drink of water. Mmm. Cool and tasty.
@FreemanVI Checking e-mail. No new messages.
@FreemanVI Editing a great article for next week’s newspaper!
@FreemanVI Breathing in. … Breathing out. …
@FreemanVI Yawning! Pointless babble is BORING! I’m a WRITER, and this is demeaning.
@FreemanVI Back to the Internet. I’ll bet there are awards for tweeting: I’ll check them out.
@FreemanVI Jackpot. “Tweets Awards 2011.”
@FreemanVI The Tweets Awards are in Spanish. Adios, amigo.
@FreemanVI Aha! Twitter.com lists several successful tweeters.
@FreemanVI Here’s a guy who tweeted about the Osama Bin Laden raid. That gives me a great idea: I’ll go where the action is and tweet about it.
@FreemanVI Waterfront Drive: The traffic is horrible. A driver is cussing out a pedestrian. Chickens are looking on.
@FreemanVI Magistrates’ Court: The guards won’t let me in with my phone. No court tweets today, folks…
@FreemanVI Pockwood Pond: Can’t… breathe…
@FreemanVI Back at the office: Action tweets were a flop. There wasn’t enough action.
@FreemanVI Plan B: I’ll read famous tweeters’ tweets. Then I’ll emulate them.
@FreemanVI According to Twitter, Lady Gaga is the most popular tweeter in the world, with more than 18 million followers. Wow!
@FreemanVI Lady Gaga recently tweeted: “Just saw first photos of the stage being built. Just peed all the way down to my Chanel shoes!! *sorry Karl* ahhh!!!!!!”
@FreemanVI Just saw Lady Gaga’s most recent tweet. Just peed all the way down to my shoes, which don’t seem to have a brand name!! * Sorry Gaga* ahhhh!!!!!
@FreemanVI Hmm. I’m not sure Lady Gaga’s style works for me. I’ll try Justin Beiber, the second most popular tweeter, with almost 17 million followers.
@FreemanVI His most recent tweet: “food. #YUMMM.”
@FreemanVI Beiber. Caveman. I’m starting to feel better about my tweeting abilities, though. Clearly, I can do better than Justin.
@FreemanVI So stay tuned, tweeps. I think I’ve got some great tweets coming soon!
@FreemanVI Oh, and keep your eyes on twitter.com, which posts celebrities’ first tweets. I expect mine will be posted there very soon.