The most important first step is to recognise the importance of constructive and positive thinking. For many of us, this step may require many phases, including frustration, self-loathing, drinking and finally acceptance. If you experience any of these feelings, the general recommendation is to “go with it” until the feeling passes. But there are other options, too:
• Frustration: Scream, “Why haven’t I got a generator?”
• Self-loathing: Accept that you are too much of a cheapskate to buy a generator.
• Drinking: Now is a good time to invent some new cocktails with those spirits that have been sitting in your cupboard for months.
• Acceptance: Now start thinking about the many wonderful new experiences that await you in a non-electricity environment! Read on for some of the fantastic possibilities.
Opportunities
Firstly, let’s remember that the power cut timeframe is best measured in weeks. That way it will come as a wonderful surprise when your power is restored in four days. Another positive is that you now have an excellent excuse for not doing that big pile of ironing.
Next, make a plan of action. There is a wealth of opportunities. My suggestions are described below. Keep in mind that you will probably have time to do each one at least twice. Why not make it into a competition? Time yourself each time, and then try to better your time the next time around!
1) Go for a swim. We are blessed with warm Caribbean seas. Swimming is good for you as well! Depending on where you live, there are various options:
• Nanny Cay to Peter Island. This nice short one will break you in. Follow this with a swim to Norman island, followed by drinks and food at Pirates Bight and the Willy T. Do not try to swim back.
• Trellis Bay to Virgin Gorda. For the more adventurous amongst you, bypass Spanish Town and carry on to North Sound. Have a rest overnight, then continue to Anegada the next day. If you miss Anegada, no problem! Not too much farther north is Bermuda!
On reaching Bermuda, you may have some difficulties with immigration. Allow for a week to sort out a new passport, have funds wired and so on. Take heart in the knowledge that when you eventually get back, the power will probably still be off!
Moreover, a wonderful new business opportunity will present itself. With your newfound expertise on Bermuda immigration laws, become a consultant and advise the many hundreds of people who will be experiencing the same problem after their swim. Who knew? Power cut = overnight millionaire!
Other ideas
2) Grow a beard. This may take longer if you are a woman. The beauty of this activity is that it takes advantage of the fact that you have no running water. It can also be performed in conjunction with other tasks in this list.
3) Read War and Peace. Backwards. Ensure that you choose an edition written in the original Russian. This may not take so long if you speak Russian, in which case try a version in another language, preferably one with non-Roman characters such as Mandarin.
4) Cook dinner. This is an excellent one, especially if you are not a great cook. You will be learning a new skill and making your family happy at the same time. My recommended recipe is roast chicken. Light a candle and hold the chicken over it. Wait some time. Once the chicken is cooked, set it aside. Repeat roasting procedure for potatoes and vegetables. If you have two candles and would like a more challenging approach, roast the chicken and vegetables simultaneously!
5) Do some work. You may think this is impossible in this “all-computers” age. Not so! You can actually extract the data from your computer even without power. Get a screwdriver, and remove the back from your computer. Inside you will find many components. Remove them at random. Then reassemble. Ta-da!
You are now a self-taught computer technician! Another potential new career awaits! You will also be supporting the local community.
When power is finally restored and you switch your computer on, the screen may be blank or may resemble an elephant’s acid trip. Take the computer to a local IT company to be fixed, and you can be satisfied that you have helped to keep people in a job when you get the invoice.
Incidentally, the bit about getting the data out isn’t true: I was just trying to motivate you!
So there you have it. Have fun this hurricane season!